Thoughtnami

And I’m still writing and editing the site, but the question has to be asked:

Do people actually want it back?

I know I have doubts about the site even coming back, and very few people actually gave a damn about the site in the first place.

And to be honest, I don’t think I’ve given anybody a reason TO give a damn about The X Bridge.

There are people with more time to do the things I’d like to do with the site. There are people more talented than me, and more willing to showcase what they can do with it. I may have been one of the first people online to talk about Toonami at length, but I wasn’t the best, not by a long shot. I didn’t have the right resources to do anything with it, and the fact that I’m not multimedia like a lot of the fourth generation of Toonami sites are hinders me rather than help. 

That’s not the kind of guy I am. I’m not a guy who wants to be behind a microphone or in front of a camera. That’s not my style. I tend to be a writer, That’s my best strength, but I know I’m just okay about it.

The fact is when I do relaunch The X Bridge, I don’t know how long it’ll be around. The fact that I haven’t rushed to bring it back a lot sooner isn’t really a judgement on how much I really feel about it. 

I love it, but it’s not the most important thing in my life right now. 

Been taking care of my mother since she’s got hospitalized back in April. She has good days. She has bad days. She’s okay, but trying to pay bills has been a struggle as of late. She’s not getting unemployment (he job won’t give it to her at all and just put her on “medical leave” so they wouldn’t even have to pay her) and I’ve been helping her fill out social security forms month after month after month, giving her the runaround and such. Meanwhile, I’ve been doing freelance design work designing a few logos and such (and got ripped off by this one jerk) and waiting every day for a substitute teaching job for the day (the school year’s a month old, and no slots have been opened up yet). And when I’m not doing that, I’m either filling out job forms left and right online. 

Maybe that’s why this whole site renewal is only half-hearted these days.

I know probably at the end of the day, perhaps 12, maybe 20 folks would actually like to read what I write at The X Bridge, just like the 12, maybe 20 folks who are reading these words over here. And you know what? 

At this point in my life, I’m actually cool with that.